just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Never let your siblings swipe right.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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