it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize
