Porn is love you can see.
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
