She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
