If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
