I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
Randomize
