Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I accidentally broke up with him while I was drunk which is really too bad since I'd just gotten a birth control perscription so we could start having sex.
Do you think he'd take me back if I said "dude, we need to get back together or this IUD is going to have an existential crisis for not realizing its full potential"?
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
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