I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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