I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
Too much gin, very little bucket
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
He has the fingertips of a God
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