Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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