i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
