I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
