Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
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