What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Randomize
