Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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