Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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