don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
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