There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Randomize
