EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize