you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
