Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I just blew my weed a kiss
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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