How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
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