Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
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