I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
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