guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
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