You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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