My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
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