This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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