Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
I would ride that face into the sunset
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
