with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Randomize
