I feel great
I just peed on a car
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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