WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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