we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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