i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Randomize
