This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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