trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
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