I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Randomize
