i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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