Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Randomize
