Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
