so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
