my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Randomize
