I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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