just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Randomize
