how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
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