doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize