the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
