gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Randomize
