So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Randomize
