I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
Michael Bay diarrhea
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Randomize
